No this is not a #squidgame event or scenario. There was no money, no debt involved. Just a desperate person.
The date was 13 June 2003. I was flipping a coin to decide if I should end my life or seek help.
Like many others who I have spoken to over the years, I know that at that very moment of coin flipping there is an uninterrupted flow of thoughts that bombards one’s mind and there is no clarity. No solution. We want to reach out, but we feel suffocated. We are waiting. Waiting for someone else to reach in. Sometimes it comes, sometimes it comes too late. Often it doesn’t come at all, and we stand there on the ledge, flipping a coin.
If you ask me now, what are the exact details that lead me to it. It no longer mattered. The details are getting blurred and not relevant. The only thing relevant is today, and tomorrow. And how many more people we can reach in to their lives so they know that they matter.
#WorldMentalHealthDay is around the corner and this year it fall on the 10th October. It is not a day for us to do more for the betterment of mental health. That is a daily routine and habit. But it is always nice to have a commemorative day.
I am by no means an expert or qualified deeply. I know I care. And often you who read this and going through something will know, that is enough.
In the mean time here are a few things we can do, or at least I have been doing to #selfhelp and make this world a better place for myself, for my neighbour, for society:
✳️ Know what makes UNHAPPY
People always tell you to make a happiness list. In truth it is hard to come up with it. It is easier to know what makes you unhappy. List it, and know what triggers it, learn to avoid it, or ask for help to deal with it. But you need to know what triggers your unhappiness.
✳️ Be content
Happiness is a devil in disguise. Once you have it, you get addicted and want more. Learn to be content. Know that if you want to achieve something, what is the quantity that will make you content. It is easier to achieve a definitive contentment than an elusive happiness
✳️ The world is moving, but it can wait
Prioritising what is important and what is urgent. Important matters (surprise surprise) to some degree can wait. If it was really important, it deserves time to be the best or be better. Urgent matters on the other hand have a margin of imperfection. So do not make urgent matters, perfectly urgent.
What really helps me through daily is I recite silently the contents I memorised off a bookmark as a kid. “Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; The courage to change the things I can; Wisdom to know the difference”